#171 - Cold Fusion

#171 – Cold Fusion

As I was writing this one, I came up with quite a few different ways to express this heinous violation of Jimi’s workspace. As my Christmas gift to you, here are the rejected Jimi punchlines from today’s comic:

“You left your nut butter on my butternut squash.”

“That ice cream ISN’T supposed to be EXTRA CREAMY!”

“You left your caviar on my fish filets.”

“Ironically, you left your load near the loaded baked potatoes.”

“You left your tadpoles on my frog legs.”

“I don’t fucking sell CREAMED spinach, okay?”

“You left your royal jelly on the Freezer Queens.”

“That shrimp is supposed to be BEER-battered, not NAD-battered.”

Transcript

Nate: What do you mean?
Jimi: Let’s just say that I know the meat department isn’t doing the only sausage handling around here.

Nate: What are you talking about? I don’t know what you’re talking about.
Jimi: No use denying it. You and Tracy are fuckin’!

Nate: Shhhh! Jesus! Okay, how did you find out?
Jimi: I was inspired to check the security tapes after I found your evidence.

Nate: Oh SHIT we forgot the condom.
Jimi: You see this? This is the only Jimmy Hat that belongs in that freezer!

Posted on December 24, 2010 at 12:00 am in Treading Ground. Follow responses to this post with the comments feed. You can leave a comment or trackback from your own site.

35 Responses

  1. Oh God, now I can’t stop thinking about how disgusting it would be to accidentally eat the food that thing touched. Yikes.

    I like the caviar line though.

  2. Sara E. says:

    Forgot the condom? Do I predict the possibility of a pregnancy scare in the future?

  3. RotSman says:

    That security cam footage? Totally ending up online. Jimi has awesome gesticulations, by the way. I take it that this counters Nate’s awesome testiculations.

  4. T-Cat says:

    HAHA! That was priceless, I love Jimmy.

  5. roland says:

    yeah those are some great one liners. i have had some co workers do the nasty in some of the same places at my job at Ralphs groceries

  6. Goddammit, I did not plan to spend my entire evening reading a new comic from start to finish >_< Thanks a lot, TG!

  7. Ginger says:

    I felt this was missing something, so I read it again and then hit that dramabutton.com thing for the appropriate sound effect.

    Ahhh, there it is. *^_^*

  8. Kobra says:

    Great extra punch lines there!
    Though the only other thing to finding a used condom in the workplace is just ICK!!!

  9. Jasmine says:

    Haha! Fail, Nate!
    Win Jimi! :P

  10. Jakub says:

    Epic Fail :D and as i like to say: A shit may occur :D

  11. jaded cynic says:

    Security tapes? For the freezer? We don’t- you Americans are PARANOID! :P

    …oh, wait – it’s also possible that Jimmy just checked footage from like the front-door cams to find out who the last two staff to leave were…

  12. Mike says:

    I just realized how much a resemblance Nate has to Dante Hicks. Both in Appearence and life

  13. Bubbaclaw says:

    Sometimes I really hate being right most of the time. Nick you may yell at me predicting this correctly. [My friends did when I figured out Sherlock Holmes in the theatre last Chistmas halfway through the film.] Still though it was funny, and I applaud you for that.
    Merry Psudo-Christian Viking Solstice to you sir.
    [I’n the end of the 7th century the Catholic Church moved Christmas to it’s present date to make it easier to convert the last of the Vikings to Christianity. December 25th was a Viking holiday that celibrated the Winter Solstice. The Vikings celebrated this holiday by hanging holly and mistletoe around their homes, and DECORATING TREES. Damn I idolized my history prof in college.]

    • David says:

      Yeah I totally noticed your call for the security tapes mention last strip. Good call I must say.
      [Just to mention, I don’t know if ‘moved Christmas to the present date’ is the right way to put it. More like ‘placed it on the winter solstice to correspond with a number of winter festivals’. There’s a number, all over the place, around that time. Like Saturnalia, or Yule (which is what you may be referencing), or Natalis Invicti (which may not pre-date christmas). Of course there’s no real paperwork anywhere, and a lot of the contemporary customs for christmas vary place to place, and many winter festivals have clear influences in modern christmas, not just one and so forth. So there’s no real saying if it was intentional (Syncretism), or just a result of being in that same time frame that it took on those qualities).

    • Nick Wright says:

      It was a good call indeed! I had to suppress the urge to blab when you mentioned it. Jimi would never have looked at them without finding Nate’s contribution, though.

  14. BMeph says:

    Heh-heh, Nate mushroom-stamped Jimi’s mushrooms.
    He “got some sack time” at work.
    He got “special sauce” on the frozen burgers.
    He made the milk extra-frothy.
    He double-churned the butter.
    He made the cottage cheese a little chunkier.

    Okay, I’ll stop now.

  15. cailement says:

    *snicker* Multiple Jimmy hats :P Definitely the best choice, but I snickered at the others, too.

  16. bob says:

    the caviar one wasn’t too bad, but the one you used in the strip along with jimmy’s expression was just priceless.

  17. Pashakitty says:

    LOL, I love the one about the butternut squash!

  18. David says:

    Love the Jimmy Hat line, definitely the best of all the ideas you kicked around.

  19. OverlordLaharl79 says:

    Just funny dood… and none of the other lines worked better than the Jimmy hat one, in my opinion. Let’s not hope there’s a pregnancy scare for Tracy and Nate in the near future.

  20. BryAnime says:

    I liked the one about the creamed spinach and the loaded potato. Mostly because I had not previously heard the term “Jimmy Hat”

  21. Darkond2100 says:

    This comic is very dude.

    [Grey Dragon Seal of Approval] by Darkond2100

  22. lcpl210 says:

    I just came across this comic today. I just read through it from the begining. Its great, I have already added it to my favorites list. Look forward to what happens next.

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